Battlefield
by Ejes
Summary: A Shinsengumi Captain. An inexperienced rookie. A war that might not be won. When Okita and the rest of the Shinsengumi leave OEdo behind to fight Amantos, they have little hope of ever coming back. But one of the rookies, Lag, refuses to lose hope, and he's ready to try his best to give faith to his Sadistic Captain... Hints of OkiKagu * T for language :D
1. Prologue

**It's-a me! Tory!  
Missed me? Don't even know who I am? It does not matter! As long as you read this story and (or so I hope) enjoy it, nothing could make me more happy!  
This fic will be in several chapters, I'll try to update it every day or so. This chapter is the prologue to set everything up!  
Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer : I don't own Gintama (at least so they say)**

* * *

Man, I've always kind of sucked at saying goodbyes. This is on my list of "worst things ever", together with waking up and seeing Hijikata-san's face every morning.

The reason we're bidding farewell? They're called the Rakutos, they are aliens, they are strong, and they are claiming Earth as theirs. They've already conquered parts of China (the country, not the annoying China girl whose parts are the last thing I want to talk about) and they thought Edo would be the next great thing to conquer. For the onsen, probably. Or the quantity of hentai goodies you can find everywhere.

Anyway, they became a threat to our country, and the government decided that the Shinsengumi would be a great offering to calm their anger. Or maybe they hope that the enemy, seeing how unprepared we are, will laugh to death.

Don't get me wrong. I am strong. Most of the Shinsengumi soldiers are strong enough to beat almost anyone. But we are merely 200 people. They are 2000. Unless a miracle shows up, we are doomed.

I suddenly feel a great pain between my legs. When I look down, I can see a foot at a place it shouldn't be. Who on Earth would kick a soldier in the balls when they are about to save the world?

"Take that, you Sadist! I heard castrated horses are faster, so since you won't need those anyway on the battlefield, be grateful I'm making you faster as well!"

There she is. The little miracle. No, really : it's a miracle she's still alive when she's so stupid she could choke herself to death with her own saliva.

I turn back to see a red and ginger midget, a sluggish silver perm-head and a pair of shiny glasses.

As I said, I hate saying goodbye. Because even the people you couldn't care less about always show up.

"Boss, may I remind you that dogs should be leashed? Take her have a pee and bring her home and I shall not fine you."

She growls, the way a dog would. I give her my best sadistic eyes. The glasses stand starts talking.

"Okita-san... Do you really have to go and fight this war?"

"No other choice, Four Eyes."

"And when are you coming back?"

I shrug.

"No worries, I'll make sure Kondo-san dies and stops stalking your sister, if that's what is troubling you."

The Boss looks at me.

"Do you think this is a war you can win?"

Another shrug.

"I guess we'll find out. It's not like I've got anything to lose anyway."

China turns her back. She gives me the finger while leaving.

"Are you telling me I won't see your face ever again? Finally some good news! I need to send flowers to the Rakutos to thank them. Get lost, Sadist."

The Boss and the Glasses looked at their feet. Were they embarrassed that this would be her last words to me?

"Sougo, time to go."

I bow to everyone who came, and leave with a strange feeling of nostalgia, and maybe a bit of pain.

She did not say her last words using her mouth. She said them with her whole body, her red cheeks, her eyes sparkling with tears. Her last present to me had been the sad smile she gave me when she turned back a few meters further.

Man, I hate goodbyes.

* * *

 **See you in a couple of days for the real 1st chapter! I hope this prologue interested you and that you want to read what's next! Subscribe if you want to know when the next chap is out, review to let me know what you think, and EAT ANPAN!**

 ***this message was in all ways sponsored by Yamazaki Sagaru***


	2. Chapter 1 : Okita

**It's time for the real story to begin! I hope you will like it 3**

* * *

Hijikata is sick. He is coughing so much that his face is starting to turn blue. He tries to reach me with his shaky hand, and all I do is watch. Everyone looks worried and tries to understand his last word. Of course, if they knew those words were "Sougo, you bastard!", they would probably just ignore him, knowing he will probably not die anyway.

He is just choking as the hot chili I put in his mayonnaise is starting to burn everything inside. He finally manages to gargle "water" and someone gives him some.

Just so that you know, drinking water to cool a chili burn is stupid and usually makes things worse. But after a while, I guess it just helps with the pain.

As soon as I realize he's going to survive, I lose all my interest and start looking at the men working in the base camp. We've been here for two days and it's only starting to stop being messy. Some new recruits have joined us, and everyone has been split into 4 groups. You can know one's group by the pin on their collar – it's quite important this time that we know who's under whose orders.

And that's when I saw him. A pin with a single stripe – my group. He is merely a man, still almost a boy. His dark hair are short and so is he. He looks so tiny in the midst of everyone, and his big green eyes make him look pure and innocent. At first, I'm annoyed. I _am_ the angel face of the Shinsengumi. If that guy tries to take my place, I shall finish him. And then, I realize that he is certainly a rookie with no experience, who joined with big dreams about becoming a hero and who is about to get crushed. No worries. He won't last a day on the battlefield. The two men he is talking with are rookies as well. One is eating Anpan. The other has a First Group pin.

"Oi, newbies. Looks like some of them have the luck to work under my orders. What about you, though? You think you're above wearing a pin?"

He gives me teary eyes. He won't last a day either.

"Captain Okita! Could you at least not pretend you don't know me in front of them? It's me, Yamazaki!"

Now the Anpan makes sense.

"Oh, Zaki. You've been here for a long time? I thought you stayed in Oedo to stalk that robot girl of yours."

"Well, a man gotta know his priorities. Kondo-san is not stalking Otae-san and you are not stalking..."

Maybe my aura makes him shut up. But perhaps the punch I gave him in the throat helped. As he leaves crying, I look at the two other rookies.

"Your names?"

The second dude talks first. Does that make him the first dude?

"Sarada Takeshi, sir. It's an honor to serve my country, sir."

I glare at my rival. He looks at me and all I can see is worry. A day? If he lasts until lunch, he'll be lucky as hell.

"I'm pretty sure I asked for your name. Disobedience already?"

He looks at his feet. Are his feet more interesting than me? I seriously doubt that.

"Lag, Captain. My name is Lag."

Damn, his voice is so childish. He is a kid, really.

"And how old are you, Lag? Don't you have a family name?"

"No sir. I don't. And I'm 18."

That midget would be a year younger than me? Hard to believe.

"Listen carefully, you maggots. This is not a playground. Outside is the real world, with real bad guys who will kill you for real. This is not Sw*rd A*t On*ine or any other shitty video game. Get hurt, you suffer. Get cut, you die. So what makes you think you're cut for the job? All I see is two kids who would shit their pants at the first occasion."

Sarada answers something, but I don't really care, because I see by the fire burning in the midget's eyes that his answer will be way more interesting.

"This country is my home, Sir. I don't care if you don't think I'm cut for the battlefield. You would not be the first one. Want to fire me? Do it. But can you really afford sending a warrior home before knowing what he's worth? Are you ready to make this sacrifice when there's so many of them outside, and so few of us inside?"

"Is that how you talk to a Captain? And what good would it do me to send a wimp to the battlefield? I'd rather save your sword for someone who looks ready to fight."

"Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm a wimp. But if I go fight alongside with everyone, even if I die, I know my death will be after cutting down several enemies. If I fall dead, then use my body as a stepping stone to jump higher, to cut more of them. If I can't fight anymore, take my sword back and use it to cut more of them. If I become useless, use me as a shield, and cut more of them. I'm here to fight, Sir. Not to prove you or anyone else I'm a worthy warrior or anything. I'm just here to defeat those who want to destroy my home."

I manage a yawn and shrug.

"You're so thin that you would do a pretty lame shield or stone, but you'll be a good decoy... If we send you, they will definitely underestimate us. Don't you guys have some work to do or anything? Stop being such lazy asses."

On such wise words, I leave to take a nap.

* * *

 **Next chapter in a couple of days~**  
 **Review! Review! Review!**


	3. Chapter 2 : Lag

**_Thanks for making it this far!  
In this chapter, you will get to know more about Lag~ Also, I gave Zaki more importance than other real Captains, because we know his name, we know how he acts, he actually talks (lookinh right at you Shimaru), and he deserves some respe... Nah just kidding._**

* * *

Chapter 2: Lag

This is the third day. We haven't even started any real fight, and yet my legs are shaky. I catch a glimpse of my reflection on a metal pole, and all I can see on my face is fear and cowardice.

 _Brace yourself_ , I think. _You're a soldier. This is not how soldiers act_.

I'm not really scared of dying out there. I really want to come back home, but if I die on the battlefield, at least it will be a honorable death. However, defeat is what scares me the most. If we lose, not only all the men here – those I take breakfast with, those I do smalltalk with – will be dead, but also everyone I'm fighting to protect. All those familiar faces back home. And I am far from sure this is a war we can win.

Today, the Captains planned a training session. Some of the newcomers have never fought before and they need to be taught how not to die in a couple of seconds. With this training, they might last a couple of minutes instead.

We are teamed up into pair within our group. There are 4 groups in total – led by Kondo, Hijikata, Okita, Yamazaki. From what I heard, Yamazaki has been appointed as an extra group Captain for this war, and he pretty much looks like he's got no idea of what to do.

I don't know if having Okita as our Captain is a blessing or a curse. He is strong and I get the feeling that if I want to become stronger, I should be in his team. But he's also really moody, and, of course, the most sadistic of them all.

And guess who I'm in pair with.

Obviously, he is looking down on me. I'm holding my wooden sword in a defensive pose, but all he does is smirking.

"That's how you hold a sword, midget? Are you perhaps giving it nicely to the enemy as a sign of peace?"

In one blow from his sword, mine is flying away from my hands.

"Listen up, you guys. If you want to end up dead, ask stupid over here how to hold a katana. If you want to see the sun rising the next day, you might want to hold it that way."

I should probably feel ashamed, but I don't. I just get my sword back, watch carefully where he puts his hands, do the same.

I've never trained in a dojo, and I've never fought using a sword. I'm more of a... Free style fighter, I guess. But in order to win this war, I'm eager to learn.

The next time, when he tries to give another hit, I'm ready. Not only do I manage to dodge, but I also move on my left and trip him. He ends up on the ground, the point of my sword between his eyes.

"I told you I wouldn't mind being used as a shield, Captain, but it looks like it's going to be the other way 'round."

I give him the exact smirk he gave me two minutes ago. Everyone around is very still. Even the other groups stopped what they were doing to watch. Guess they're not used to see that guy losing.

"Don't get too cocky, rookie."

He kicks my ankle with his own and sweeps me. Now we both are tasting the dust, but surprisingly he does not look angry.

"What are you guys doing? Daydreaming? Sure, that's going to be _so_ useful when fighting Rakutos. Go on, fight!"

I get up and hold my hand to help the Captain up. He ignores me and gets up on his own.

"Training's not over, maggot."

The training lasts until noon, with sword practice, push-ups, learning the Shinsengumi Code by Hijikata, and of course the First Division Captain mocking us all along.

After lunch, we are supposed to train once more, but our Captain is missing. I decide to sneak around while he's not here, leaving the rest of my group training as we're supposed to.

I don't know what lured me to that place. That place? The middle of nowhere, literally. Quite far from the camp. Surrounded by trees. Maybe it's the smell. Yes, it's gotta be the smell. A sweet fragrance, like incense. No, it actually is incense. I see him kneeled on the ground, before a little stick of burning incense, his hands joined, his head low, his eyes closed. He's praying. Without his sadistic glare, he looks younger. He looks like a kid.

Without a sound, I withdraw and go back to my training, feeling sad for no logical reason.

* * *

 ** _Please leave a review 3_**


	4. Chapter 3 : Lag

_**Here we are, Chapter 3! I actually had to cut Lag's chapter in 2 because it was too long, this is why this is still Lag's POV. No worries, Okita is next 3**_

* * *

When the evening comes, I watch as men cheerfully eat and drink together. Sarada offers me sake. I refuse – I never drink alcohol.

When it comes to meal time, divisions or groups don't matter anymore. On my left is Sarada, on my right and in front of me are two men from other groups, who have served for many years now. Only the Captains are eating together. The men around me tell me it's quite unusual, but I can get them. Everyone here is smiling, laughing, singing. Everyone but the them, all wearing the same gloomy face.

"What's with them?" asks Sarada, instinctively lowering his voice.

"What's with us?", another man gloomily answers. "Tomorrow is our first day of battle. Might be the last day for most of us. And here we are, celebrating as if something good happened."

The atmosphere gets heavier at my table. No one knows what to answer to that.

I don't know either. So I chose not to answer, and to change the topic.

"Since you've been in the Shinsengumi for so long, what can you tell us about the Commander, the Vice-Commander and the Captain Okita? They all look like weird humans."

"Well, who should I start with? The Commander, Kondo-san, is a good man. True to his heart, caring, he will never leave anyone behind. He is kind and passionate. But he's also a big moron, and there's this girl in Oedo, like the scariest girl in town, but he fell for her and he keeps on stalking her whenever he can, and wherever she goes. I remember that time when..."

It worked. The mood is cheerier again. They all go by their own anecdote of when he came back with his face all bruised because of her, or when they had to arrest a guy for exhibitionism only to discover it was their own chief. They've got plenty of funny stories and even I feel lighter.

"What about Hijikata-san, then?"

And there they go once again, talking about his crazy addiction to mayonnaise, his rivalry with the leader of the Odd Jobs agency, the Yorozuya, and how skilled and proud he is and remember when he pretended to be a prince of the Mayora Planet and that time when Okita-san almost trapped him in a 'Saw' remake.

Between two laughters, Sarada manages to ask about our Captain.

"What about Okita-san, then? Is he as crazy as the two others?"

People slowly stop laughing. Their faces are still smiling, but their eyes are not.

"Well, Okita-san... He's a top-class Sadist. He tries to murder Hijikata-san at least once a day. He's probably the best warrior we have, but honestly... He scares me a bit. He's like a wild animal: you never really know when he's going to bite."

"Well", keeps on another man, the one on my right, "he lost a lot to begin with. He was just a kid when he joined Kondo-san, before the Shinsengumi was created, but even then, his parents had died tragically. His life is not some kind of fairy tale. He's sadistic, sarcastic and cold, but I don't think he's a bad man. He still would die to protect us. But I don't know many person strong enough to defeat him anyway. The only one strong enough to fight back..."

"Don't you have anything more interesting to do? If you're so interested in my life, maybe we could go somewhere and talk about it in private... With our swords?"

He really appeared out of nowhere, and whispered his words on my neighbor's ear. Everyone gasps.

"Captain, I'm sorry ! I did not mean to..."

"Stop telling nice stories about me, the rookies will start believing it. They're trying to find some humanity in me, but don't buy that – I kill for fun, I torture for fun, people's sorrow is my greatest entertainment."

He gives us an 'Okita Special', a smile dripping with sadism. Sarada averts his eyes. Everyone does, but me. I give him a 'Lag Special': a honest look, right in the eyes.

"That incense you were burning earlier. Who was it for?"

Another general gasp. Looks like you're not supposed to answer back the Captain. I don't care. He looks angry now. I still don't care.

"So you were slacking off, weren't you? Are you aware that we are taking you on the battlefield tomorrow? Could you be telling me your offer of being my dead shield still holds?"

"It does, Captain. But you did not answer. Who was it for?"

This is a game. His eyes are locked in mine and the first to look away loses. But none of us is willing to lose.

"My sister. She died two years ago. I asked her to cook me an awesome meal up in heavens once I'll be dead because of one of your stupid mistake. Mistake you would not make if you properly trained."

I don't answer, but I don't avert my gaze from his. We could have stayed like this all night long, if Kondo-san did not call him. He gave me a cold glare and left.

In my head, I secretly felt I won this round.

* * *

 ** _Haaa, could a battle finally happen next? This story is called battlefield and no one actually fought on said battlefield yet!_**

 ** _See you for next chapter, and don't forget to leave a review 3_**


	5. Chapter 4 : Okita

_**Hi there! Did you have a nice weekend ? Are you having a nice week? Christmas is coming closer and closer, you know! And I'm planning some other fanfics to post once this one is over, so stay tuned !**_

 _ **Anyway, chapter time! It's finally time for some battle to happen!**_

* * *

I'm not a morning person. But it feels like this morning is the worst I had in ages. I feel dizzy and sick, and I know the sake I had yesterday isn't to blame.

Usually, waking up on a battle day does not really make me nervous. Even knowing that we might come back with a few men missing doesn't bother me – as a Captain this is something you need to learn to live with.

But today, how many won't be coming back? Or perhaps should I ask how many will be coming back? How many of these men currently gulping down their rice today will be gulping down their rice tomorrow?

My sleepy eyes stop on Lag. He barely touched his bowl, and his eyes are ringed with exhaustion. He stares blankly at the wall.

I'm a sadistic Captain, but it is my duty to cheer up my men before an important battle. I sit next to him and steal some rice from his bowl with my chopsticks.

"Are you planning to die even before reaching the battlefield by starving? Then do something useful, gimme that rice."

He looks at me with dead eyes and pushes his bowl in front of me.

"Eat that rice, moron. If you die because you did not eat enough, I will be held accountable for that."

He gives a faint smile and stuff some rice in his mouth. I take my own rice and start eating as well, looking at all the men and trying to spot the ones who were feeling really down. At the end of the breakfast, as everyone is getting ready, I give to every single one of them some encouragement words and a pat on the shoulder. Seeing that my youngest member is missing, I start asking around if anyone saw him. Sarada answers.

"He's getting dressed in his own tent. He told us he's got quite a few scars that he'd rather not show anyone... It seemed really important to him. If you really wanna know, I think he might have been physically abused when he was a kid or something. Such a polite and discrete guy, that wouldn't surprise me overmuch."

Respecting his privacy (for now, as soon as the time of goofing around is back I'm planning to harass him), I help some of my men getting ready and join Hijikata, Kondo and Zaki outside.

"Oh, Sougo. You did not come to our table for breakfast, so I'm going to sum up the plans for today."

"Sorry, Kondo-san, seeing Hijikata-san so early in the morning upsets my stomach. I'd rather spend my time with simpletons than with a freak like him."

Hijikata doesn't answer, and Kondo moves on with the strategy he came up with. This is just how stressed out everyone is.

Each Captain gathers his men. We cannot surround the enemy, but while Hijikata-san's and Kondo-san's groups will attack from the front and serve as decoys, Zaki's will strike from their east side and mine from their west side. All we can hope is that the element of surprise allows us to win this battle.

Adrenaline is a strange thing. While this morning everyone was nervous, all I can see now in everyone's eyes as we are a couple of minutes from a deadly fight is determination.

Hidden by the vegetation, we wait for the signal. We suddenly hear screaming from the Rakutos, and as I look up, I see that Hijikata and Kondo had reached the enemy army. A man crouching next to me with binoculars tells me that Zaki's division is ready. I unsheathe my sword and start running, followed by my men.

There's not much I can say about the fray that followed. I cut down Rakuto after Rakuto, and only a few of them manage to touch me. I can't really see how the others are doing. All I know is that our opponents did not expect the ambush, and that gives us an incredible advantage.

Only a few Rakutos are still up where I am. They were a bit more numerous than us, but clearly not the whole army. As I turn around to see how many men of the Shinsengumi are still standing, I feel a deadly aura on my back. It's too late for me to react, I know it. I can feel the point of the sword piercing my shoulder. But as I manage to see the face of the alien cutting me, I notice the blade piercing his own body, right through the heart. He lets go of his sword and is dead even before his head hits the ground. Behind him, covered in blood, a shaky hand holding the sword that saved me, stands Lag. He gives me angry eyes, but with his young boy's face it's hard to feel threatened.

"Don't you repeat all the time that one should _never_ slacken on a battlefield? What kind of idiot does not follow his own principles?"

"So you're alive, uh? Nice one. Talk to your Captain that way one more time and I'll finish you."

"Of course you will. So, you wanna sit, build a fire and roast marshmallows, or should we give a hand to our comrades to prevent them from dying?"

Deep inside, I'm glad he's fine. By respecting me so little, he might be one of those I actually respect. But I also owe him my life, and that part sucks.

I watch him fight a bit. He's not as weak as I thought. Actually, he's pretty good with a sword, especially after only a day of training. He might survive this war, after all.

And maybe I will, too.

* * *

 _ **DAMN YOU SOUGO STOP STARING AND FIGHT, FOR PETE'S SAKE!**_

 _ **Oops, sorry. But if he's distracted he'll die, right ? And since this is not the last chapter, I can't have him die, can I?  
See you for the next chapter, folks! **_


	6. Chapter 5 : Lag

_**First of all, thanks for your reviews! Since English is not my mother tongue, I'm very self conscious about my style. I'm doing my best but I'm always scared people would stop reading because it is weirdly written. So thanks a lot for your nice words 3**_

* * *

We won. No matter how much I repeat these two words in my head, they don't make sense. We won.

Have we really, though? So many of us are injured. We lost 50 men. If we are to fight tomorrow, barely 100 can still hold a sword. That makes half of the number we were this morning.

And this was just a first fight. It was not the whole army, but only a small group of them. They will have called for reinforcement soon enough.

My body aches. I was not cut a lot, but the injuries were deep enough to hurt a lot.

"Lag, come over here, I'll treat you."

I look up to see Sarada with a needle and bandages.

"I'll take care of myself. Give me what I need to clean the cuts and close them."

"But -"

"I told you. I really don't want you guys to see... Well, you'll keep asking questions I don't want to answer afterwards. Give me that."

Lowering his head, he hands me what I need. I take it and isolate myself where I can be alone.

I remove my shirt, and notice my bandages are soaked in blood. I remove them. My back is really painful. The bandages were so tight I could barely breathe, so I take a good gulp of air before changing them. I catch a reflection of my back on the blade of my sword. I felt sorry I had to hide such a thing from them, but these were a lot of scars for a youngster like me. Not to mention... Well, I'd better not mention it.

The pain I felt from the wounds is nothing compared to the pain I feel now, stitching them with no anesthetic.

Once I'm done, I bandage everything again. I grunt and try to ignore the pain as much as I can.

I leave the room as soon as I'm done and help the others taking care of the wounded. I'm surprised to see that some Captains are helping as well – the one with the orange Afro or the bald one. Yamazaki (I still don't know if I should call him Captain or not – he leads a group but is not a Shinsengumi Captain officially) is among the wounded. I go to him to inspect his wounds.

"Are you alright, leader? Where does it hurt?"

He's quite pale and looks at me with feverish eyes.

"Lag-kun... There is something you can do for me... Please..."

"Whatever you need, Leader."

"Anpan... I need... Anpan..."

I feel like smashing my foot on his face. We are treating hurt people and he's here hungry? I sigh and get up to find him some stupid pastry.

My steps lead me to where he packed all his stuff. There is a bag full of Anpan. And when I say full, there must be at least 5kg of them. I take a couple of them and am about to leave when I hear some voices arguing nearby.

"Stop with that, Sougo! Do you want to get yourself killed? Are you really planning to die here?"

"Leave me alone, Hijikata-san. I'm too tired to hear your blabbering. This might be our only chance to win."

"This is just suicide. Going there alone would only lead in your death."

"Does it matter anyway?"

"This conversation is over. My answer is no. This is a direct order. Disobey, and even if you survive I'll have you executed."

I hear footsteps leaving. I'm afraid to move. I don't want them to know I overheard.

"Oi. This place doesn't need useless rodent eavesdropping."

The cold metal of the blade on my cheek tells me I've been found out anyway. I look behind me to see two cruel crimson eyes staring at me.

"I was not doing this on purpose. Yamazaki asked me to get him some Anpan, and then... Well, I did not want to interfere."

He slowly brought his sword back to its sheath, not averting his gaze.

"What did you hear, exactly?"

It seems this has become our game: he gives me a cold glare, I give him a pure and honest one.

"Is it true what you said? You don't feel like it matters if you die?"

"Why would you care?"

"How can I trust a man to be my Captain and to lead me to victory, if he does not value his own life?"

He keeps silent. I don't.

"Don't you have anyone back in Oedo waiting for your return?"

He looks away. I win. But it always feel like I'm also loosing.

"There's no one like that. All the men that could care about me are here. And I honestly don't expect them to come back alive either."

I'm sick of his vision of life. I'm sick of him whining. He's doubtlessly going to make me regret this sooner or later but I could not care less.

I slap him. He looks shocked and grabs instinctively his sword, but does not draw it. I'm not done yet.

"'No one' ?! Don't make me laugh! I don't know such a person! Isn't there a shop you used to go often? A bar where you were a regular customer, maybe? Did you not protect anyone on this city ? Do you think those people are not waiting for you to come back?"

I clench my fists and I'm shaking, but my anger does not waver.

"The men told me about those people you fought with. The Yorozuya. They say they are Shinsengumi's most precious allies. And they told me how close you were of the Yorozuya girl. How you'd always pick up fights with her, how you'd stop doing anything you were doing if you saw her just to go and annoy her. Don't you think they'll be sad if you died? Don't you think she might want to see you back, just to be able to kick you in the face?"

"Lag, you..."

"I've lost precious friends because of stupid wars like this. I know what it is to be home and to worry for someone you care, not knowing if they will be coming back one day. You have people who care about you, Captain. So stop trying to throw your life away. Survive, and make your way back home, because they are waiting for you!"

I run away, ignoring the people who stopped by when hearing the yelling. I think I'm crying. I'm crying because I remember every single person I lost. I'm crying because I'm angry they did not get the chance to come back home so that I could welcome them with a smile.

And most of all, I'm crying because I feel infinite sadness for this Captain who did not even know he had a home to return to.

* * *

 _ **Is Lag too dramaqueen? (is Drama King a word?) But isn't he right however? Is Okita being too selfish? Too pessimistic? Will he go on that suicide mission? Find out in the next chapter!**_

 _ **As always, feel free to leave a review, anonymous ones welcome as well!**_

 _ **(oh and my head is full of new scenarios for Gintama fanfics so be prepared to hear from me a lot hehehe)**_


	7. Chapter 6: Okita

**_Hi guys! Thanks for your lovely reviews. If you also write fanfics you know how happy we always are when we see someone reviewed our work. If you don't write... Know that it always matters, it always makes your day. Really. Thanks a lot._**

* * *

This night's dream is weird. I see my sister walking away. I try to run after her, but no matter how far I run, they are still out of my reach. I trip and fall. A hand helps me up. It's Kondo-san's. He gives me a comprehensive smile and looks behind me, so I do too.

Everyone is here. The Shinsengumi, the cabaret girls, the transvestite, the Hyakka, the hobo, the Yorozuya boss with his dead fish eyes, the glasses holder with his shiny glasses, China.

Everyone is looking straight at me. Their eyes do not show any anger or sadness. They gleam with pureness and honesty.

Kondo-san speaks, but when I look at him, it's not Kondo anymore. It's Lag. His tears are roaming freely on his cheeks. He gives me a sad smile while talking.

"Survive, and make your way back home, because they are waiting for you!"

I wake up. On my way to the breakfast, I meet Hijikata-san. He's leaning against a wall, smoking, his arms crossed. He barely looks at me, but when I'm about to walk in front of him, he talks.

"So? Are you going against my orders and spilling your life recklessly?"

"No. Someone... I realized that I did not want to die, anyway. The only person who can kill China is me, and the only one who can kill me is her. This is a kind of twisted promise I can't risk to break."

He blows out his smoke and smile.

"So a kid got you to listen to reason, uh? I don't know who that Lag boy is, but I should thank him properly, I guess. And so do you."

I start walking again, on my way to the breakfast.

When I enter the room, there is a heavy silence. Of course, those chatterboxes gossiped about it all night long, I bet. I look without really meaning to for Lag. Things are going to be awkward. I'm pretty bad with awkwardness.

"Captain! Captain Okita!"

That midget is the one calling me, his mouth stuffed with rice. He waves at me and speaks up, spitting food everywhere.

"Since you don't care about living anyway, I thought I might eat your rice as well! You said you did not want me to starve because you'd be held accountable but I'm sure I won't if _you_ starve! Hope you don't mind!"

He indeeds have two bowl of rice in front of him. One empty. One soon empty. I come closer and grabs his face, squishing his hamster cheeks.

"You sure got some nerve, don't you? I don't mind receiving a blame for your death if I actually cut your throat, though... So now put these chopsticks down and go get me a new bowl of rice... Are we clear?"

The threat in my voice is pretty clear, and yet the whole room burst in laughters. Even the midget gives me a moronic smile.

"Now that's a man I'd follow to hell if I had to. A new bowl of rice, coming right away!"

And somehow, I ended up laughing as well.

Zaki and a few other spies are checking on the enemy's campsite. They will be telling us when the reinforcement are coming back. It's been a week now, so I guess they do not care much about us for now.

Lag is learning fast, and I soon enough start training more intensively with him. We fight one-on-one and every time I beat him, I tell him what was wrong. I must confess he sometimes beats me too. I might have the upped hand but if he keeps learning that much, he might become one of our strongest warrior. And it's only been a week since his training started. He told me he has been taught how to fight with a gun but never with a sword, and that seems hard to believe.

The only thing about him is his stamina – he gets tired way faster than anyone. If a fight lasts more than three or four hours, he will be done.

He tells me a bit about his family, about his moronic brothers, his scary sister, his pitiless grandmother. I try to talk about his parents once, but he looks away, and I never speak of it again. He asks me about my life as well, so I tell him about everyone I know back in Oedo. When I drink a bit too much, I talk about my sister. He never asks, but I tell him anyway. I tell him about the battles the Shinsengumi fought, about who we fought against, about who we fought alongside.

I hate to admit it, but I enjoy his company, and I suspect Hijikata-san and Kondo-san make sure we are not bothered. They probably think I've never had a friend of my age and that it's a good thing I've got someone to open up to.

Well, I can't say they're wrong, however.

I was quietly enjoying a drink with Lag (who as always took water rather than sake) when Zaki came back with bad news.

Peace and resting time were gone. The Rakutos were back, and among them was their General.

* * *

 _ **Dun dun duuuuun! So Okita did not go on his suicide mission, but it looks like the suicide mission is coming to him?! On the next chapter, the ultimate battle! There will be swords, people hurt, and even... PEOPLE STABBED? My my, if I were you I'd start to worry about the characters I love!**_

 _ **Who should die? Who should live? Let me know in the comments!  
(sorry the story's already complete on my computer though, so it's just curiosity, you won't be able to change what's going to happen hahaha)**_


	8. Chapter 7 : Lag

_**Once again, thanks a lot for your support!**  
 **Another battle chapter! Who will make it out in one piece? Who will get terribly hurt? Read and find out!**_

* * *

Here we are again, all nervous, knowing that this morning might be our last. But this time, I eat as much rice as I can: if I am to die, I want to do it with my belly full.

I don't see the Captains anywhere – and by that I mean all the Captains. They must be setting a strategy to keep as many of us alive as they can. I remember seeing a spark in my Captain's eyes vanishing when he learnt the Rakutos were back. All I hope is that he remembers he's got people to return to.

After stuffing my stomach with all the food I found, I follow the others to get ready. Our shirts are carefully tucked in our trousers. Our swords are hanging by our side. Everyone is doing this so mechanically, with no expression in their eyes, they all look like zombies. Maybe we are zombies, after all. Walking corpses.

But when we meet our Captains, I know something has changed. Their faces are grave but their eyes are telling a different story. Those eyes are full of hope.

"Gentlemen, we have some good news to deliver. We are getting reinforcement. The Mimawarigumi is on their way and together with them, a thousand soldier. There will be no ambush this time. We are attacking from the front, altogether, and we must hold until they get there. Remember that there is no honor in dying on the battlefield – I'm asking you guys to survive. I won't blame anyone who does not feel like fighting. You can stay here and help the wounded that will come. But if you wish to lend your sword, and to fight by our side... I shall be the one honored to have such companions."

Kondo-san's words lit hope in everyone's eyes. We are saved. We really are.

As everyone split up according to their group, Okita puts his hand on my shoulder.

"We'll make it, Lag. We are going home alive. We are going back to our people. I promise."

He smiles and I smile back. I believe those words. I believe this man.

"You are right, Captain. We are going home. Together."

It's ridiculously sunny and hot out there. Shouldn't battles be gloomy, with a terrible weather? Is the sun trying to remind us not to lose our faith by shining this bright?

"You alright? Ready to cut them into slices, rookie?"

I return the cruel smile.

"Readier than ever, Captain."

"Time to go then. Shinsengumi... FIGHT!"

Sword in hand, we start running towards the enemy, obviously waiting for us. I have the stupid idea to count how many of them there are. About three times our number. Holding until help gets to us is going to be tough. But we can't give up. If I want to see my family and friends back, I need to be strong.

I can feel the difference with the last battle. This time, they are prepared. And they are stronger. No matter how many I cut, they only come more numerous.

I end up being back to back with my group Captain. He's barely even hurt, obviously. He is way too strong for them. But there is no way he could win on his own.

I'm not that much injured either, actually. The bandages crushing my ribs are more painful than the few cuts I have. But I'm already starting to feel exhaustion because of my poor stamina.

"I guess we are a good team, midget. It looks like the two of us killed more than anyone."

"I don't know about that, Captain. Are they actually dying? I see no difference."

He swings his sword right above my head, slicing the throat of a Rakuto that was jumping on me, as my blade pierces the belly of another one, coming for the Sadist Captain.

We hear some explosions. Rakutos are terrible cheaters. They brought guns. Ah, I wish I had mine as well.

"Hey, Captain."

"What is it?"

"If I were to die here – and I don't mean I'm planning to, but let's just pretend – I wanted you to know I've been glad to fight by your side."

"Don't say shitty stuff like that. Keep it for when we will be drinking and celebrating victory."

"Really, it was fun. I enjoyed being your friend. If we are to fight again... I don't give a shit if it is as rivals or as allies. No matter what, let's fight as friends."

He doesn't speak, at loss for words. I'm sure he wanted to tell me that in books, this was the kind of speech someone would say as they are dying, so I should not be telling him that.

But he glances at me and understands why I gave such a farewell speech.

Rakutos are terrible cheaters. They brought guns. And one of their bullet was lodged inside my belly, probably in the middle of a puddle of rice.

I give him a last smile before collapsing on the ground. The only pain I perceive is the one on his eyes as he grabs me, yelling something. My name. But is it really my name?

It doesn't matter anyway. I can't hear a thing. I can't see a thing.

Nothingness swallows me.

* * *

 ** _Uwaaaah! Laaaag! I'm sorry boy, it was for the plot, surely you understand! Please don't hate me! I'm just a mere author trying to survive in this ocean of fanfictions with much better plot, I had to shoot you to make the story interesting ;A; Blame the evil Rakutos!  
_** ** _...  
_** ** _No actually I'm just a crazy sadist person. But I still liked you a bit, so sorry 'bout that kid._**

 ** _So, did it go as you planned? Are you secretly happy Okita is alive, you heartless person? Let me know!_**


	9. Chapter 8 : Okita

_**Given how last chapter ended, I feel it would be fair to at least know a little more about Lag. And you are going to know everything you want to know right here!**_

* * *

It can't be happening. No way. No. Lag's body is limp, like a rag doll. His face froze on his smile. But when I hold him, I still can feel a pulse. There is a chance to save him.

He was covering my back and I his. He was under my protection. I promised him I would get him back home. So he will not die on me.

I manage to throw his motionless body on my back, and make my way back to where he could be treated, cutting down anyone standing on my way.

I can see Hijikata fighting over there. He sees me and gives me a worried look. I give him the finger and keep walking. Over there, Zaki is in trouble. I throw my sword and make a hit: the blade pierces the skull of the Rakuto. I take Lag's sword; he did not let go of it. His hand is barely warm now. I have to hurry. I'm way too conscious about his blood spreading on my back.

Our campsite, at last. Our opponents have not made their way here, and they are still defending their own. I hope it's a good omen. I don't know how long before the Mimawarigumi gets here.

"You, over here! Who's in charge of treating the wounded?"

"That would be me, Captain. But we have so many injured, and so few to take care of them... Who's hurt?"

I know the guy. He's one of the rookie. The guy that was talking with Lag most of the time. What was it... Lettuce? Spinach? Oh, right. Sarada.

He freezes when he sees who I'm carrying.

"He got shot in the stomach. You need to remove the bullet and stitch the wound."

He won't move. He looks lost.

"But that's... I don't think I can... I'm sorry, Captain, but he said..."

"Could you stop mumbling to yourself, goddammit? If you did not notice, he's losing blood. A lot. So get a fucking knife and take the fucking bullet out."

"I'm sorry but I can't, Captain. I promised."

I feel like I could kill him on the spot for insubordination.

"Promised? What kind of sick promise is that? 'I swear I will watch you die slowly and painfully?' Just do it!"

He looks down. We don't have time for him to look down. Why isn't he already extracting that bullet, for fuck's sake?

"Lag made me promise... No, he made us all promise... That we never should see him undressed. He added that even if he was wounded... He did not want us to look at those scars... He'd rather die than let us know. I can't break my promise. I swore on everything I care about."

Did we really have time for a long speech? Hell no.

"I don't remember promising anything. Get me everything necessary. I won't let him die and I don't care about his pride and his stupid scars.

Sarada hurries and brings me a knife, gloves, and everything else on the "soldier repair kit". I moved Lag somewhere no one would see him, to respect his moronic wish.

I cut his shirt open. At first, all I can see is blood. And that's all I care about. Using the knife, I make a clean cut where the bullet is. I can see his face twitching – all I hope is that he does not feel the pain as clearly as if he were awake.

I find the little ball of metal and remove it. The wound is deep. Really deep. I clean it as well as I can and close the cut with clumsy stitches.

That's only when I'm done that I see what he's been hiding to the world. Bandages are wrapped really tight around his chest. Some scars are showing up, looking like battle wounds from fights that happened in the past. But this is not what he was hiding.

Somehow, I always kind of knew. At least, a part of my brain knew but decided it was useless information that would not help us win this war, and did not communicate with the rest of the cells.

Those bandages were not here to hide some scars. They were used to hide Lag's feminine chest.

But this is not it, is it? The face is too familiar. The fighting style, as well. I lift her eyelids carefully, and remove the green lenses. Now, two blank cerulean eyes are watching me.

It all makes sense. Lag's strength. Lag's ability to fight even though he wasn't used to fight with a sword. How quickly he lost his stamina by staying out in the sun.

She moves a bit, and I can see she's awake. Merely.

"So I've been found out, uh? Sadist, promise me..."

She coughs, and when she does she spits blood.

"Promise me not to do anything reckless. You've got people who are waiting for you... Remember?"

She falls back into unconsciousness.

I take my jacket off and cover her body to hide her 'secret' from the others. I glare coldly at Sarada.

"This is an order. Do whatever it takes. Lag is to survive. No matter what."

I grab my sword - Lag's sword, China's sword - and realize this might be the last time I'd ever have talked to China.

The world turns red. I do not control my body anymore. I do not think anymore. I am simply a killing machine.

And every single Rakuto will die by my hand.

* * *

 _ **Please tell me that wasn't too obvious! I was terrified this would be too obvious! (if you re-read the chapters now, it will look so obvious anyway, hahaha)  
As you can guess, some of your reviews made me laugh a bit, now that you know you might see why x'D  
Next chapter will be the last, I will post it on Sunday!**_

 _ **Also, I've got a question~ I'm writing some other OkiKagu fanfics and one of them was planned to be a one shot but is almost 6k words long. Would you rather have me split it into 2 chapters or do you think 6k is still okay for a one shot?**_

 _ **Can't wait to hear from you! See you on Sunday for the conclusion!**_


	10. Conclusion

_**I'm sparing you the emotional talk for the end of the chapter. This is the last part!**_

* * *

Everything is really bright. I can see it though my closed eyelids.

I wake up to the sound of muffled voices yelling. I don't know why, but hearing those two people getting mad at each other, even if I don't understand what they say, gives me a feeling of safety.

As I emerge from the mist, I start to get the words. They are not in the room, but still close, so I guess they must be behind a door or something. Their familiar voices make me feel home.

"You listen to me, mayonnaise freak! What kind of leader gives so little fuck to his soldiers not to notice a WOMAN is among them! And she's just a kid anyway! Are you jerky enough to think that a KID could be fit for a war?"

"No, YOU listen to me, stupid perm-head! You call herself her tutor? You pretend taking care of her? Then could you tell me why you did not notice she was gone? Because obviously, if you had noticed, you would have known she'd join us, right? She died and cut her hair, for fuck's sake! This is not something you do in 5 minutes! You had plenty of time to come home and understand what she was doing! Let me guess, you spent your whole day and night drinking booze and thought she was asleep when you got back?!"

He lowers a bit his voice.

"And she's not a kid nor a woman. She's a Yato. She was born a warrior. I'm sure that even when she was five, she was still stronger than most of my men. Furthermore... It's not like anything really bad could have happened to her, right? I mean, we messed up and didn't think the Rakutos would bring guns. But that aside... She was under Sougo's care. Even if he did not know who she really was, he grew fond of the kid and would have protected him – _her_ – to his last breath."

The memories of all that happened brutally come back to me. Me running away from the Yorozuya. Going to a hair salon, giving them extra money to take care of me right away. Asking Anego to lend me some of Shinpachi's clothes. Hugging her goodbye when she understands I won't change my mind. Joining a group of men on their way to fight with the Shinsengumi, blending in. Blending in even more. Becoming a Shinsengumi member. Training with my rival. No. He was my Captain. Becoming friend with him. Fighting with him. Feeling like I'm dying by his side. Always lying to him.

The Sadist. I suddenly open my eyes and sit up. Is he fine? Hijikata obviously is fine enough to be arguing with Gin-chan, but what about the Sadist?

"I should have finished you there."

My heart stops racing. His drawling voice soothes my worries. I turn my head and he is sitting on the bed a few meters away, staring at the door where the voices come.

"How dared you lie for so long? I almost trusted you. No, I actually trusted _Lag_. I should have seen it coming. Are you aware that you almost died out there, China?"

His voice is quiet and low, but the anger is here. However, I refuse to lower my eyes. I give him a _Lag Special_ and he looks at me right at that moment. His fists are clutched, but they are shaking.

"I won't apologize. I refused to spend my days sitting in the sofa, watching the news to know if you guys had died there. I am a fighter. My role is not to be at home cooking yummy lunches. My role is to fight, and to make sure you are coming home alive. So now, tell me what happened."

He sighs. I win again. And this time, it really feels like a victory.

"I'm not sure myself. Hijikata-san told me that he saw me going back to the battlefield after leaving you at the infirmary. I don't remember a thing, actually, but he said I slashed Rakuto after Rakuto, and I did not even dodge their hits... Thus all the bandages making me look like a mummy. Anyway, the backups got there right on time, and I collapsed because of massive blood loss. Apparently, the Mimawarigumi cut the head of the enemy General and they finally retreated."

I look at him with teary eyes, understanding what he implies.

"Do you mean..."

"Yeah, China", he smiles and I somehow feel light. "We won. I promised you. We got home alive. We got back to our people."

And I smile back at him.

"Let me welcome you back, then. Not as Lag, but as Kagura."

I leave my bed and punch him in the face.

"I hope you will choke to death. But I'm glad you survived, and if you ever think no one here in Edo cares about you, I will show you how much I care by slicing your throat."

I then take his hand in both of mine and lock my eyes in his.

"Welcome back, Sadist."

* * *

 _ **Time for being a chatterbox!**_

 _ **This fic actually had 2 other titles before I settled for Battlefield. The first one was "just a soldier" and I really did not like it, but hey, you gotta name your files when saving them so that's all that came to my mind when I started writing.  
The 2nd title was "Mulan", because as you might understand now, it is freely inspired by Mulan's story! But then I realised it would actually spoil the whole fic, hahaha. So it became "Battlefield", because I suck at titles (y)**_

 _ **[Edit : I'm adding this because I forgot to talk about it!] Did you know there was a story behin Lag's name? If you pronounce it the Japanese way, it is "Ragu". And guess who gets called Gura several times in the anime? I just inverted the syllables ;) [end of the edit]**_

 _ **I've got at least 3 other fanfics to post! They'll be shorter (one shots), and one is a Christmas themed one so it will be out on the 24th. I might post one every week until Christmas actually! They are OkiKagu fics because I cannot write anything else hahahahaha**_

 _ **Also, Gintama anime is starting back the 8th of January. Who is excited? I sure am! I spend my days watching Gintama AMV. Do you watch some? Any good recommandation?**_

 _ **Anyway, thank you so much to everyone who read this fanfic from the beginning to the end. Thanks even more to those who took time to review it. Your comments always made my day, and boy when a chapter was out I couldn't stop checking my mails to see if someone reviewed because it makes me so happy! If you read a fanfic that is complete, even if it has been completed for a while, be sure to leave a review to tell the author what you thought of it. I'm just as happy to read a review for the fic I'm posting as for a fic I posted a year ago!**_

 _ **EmeraldNorth, XTataraX, daslevfka, perpetualpoverty, and you who are reading this right now, thank you for having given this fanfiction some of your precious time. You are awesome and if I could I would hug you a thousand times. Until you'd call the cops and I'd go to jail for being really creepy. Really, that's how much I love you!**_

 ** _I hope to see you around when my next fanfic is out!_**


End file.
